By Julie Stockman
Oh how I love those two lines on a pregnancy test stick after months – or years – of trying. With them comes the leaping expectant joy of bringing a whole new person into this world. Those two lines mean hoping against hope for a brand new pair of tiny soft feet, a new voracious nursling, a new snuggler in the rocking chair.
That big fat positive test also brings the responsibility of supporting a new life in every way possible. Time to cut out the caffeine again, try to reduce stress, rest more often, worry over food, and find someone you trust to help you along in this process.
As I mentioned in my my last post, for my past two births, this person has been a homebirth midwife. Most of my friends have also chosen to birth their babies with the assistance of a midwife. We often sit at playgroups or potlucks telling snippets of our birth stories and snippets of our experiences with midwives and obstetricians.
Not everyone is happy with their births and their birth attendants. As I’ve listened to their stories and reflected on my own, some common themes have emerged. If you are newly pregnant or thinking of changing your birthing attendant, consider these tips for finding a midwife who is a good fit for you.
Hospital, Birth Center or Homebirth?
If you are considering using a midwife for your birth, the first question is always hospital, birth center, or homebirth? Each has its pros and cons, which are fairly straightforward. On one end of the scale you have the hospital, the place most equipped to handle emergencies but least likely to provide a completely natural and unmedicated birth. On the other end of the scale, you have homebirth. You are ensured to have a natural birth at home, but the emergency equipment is most rudimentary of all the options and might include a transfer. A birth center typically lies in the middle.
The midwives who practice in a hospital or birth center are quite different from those who practice homebirth. In most places in the US, having a homebirth resides in the gray area between legal and illegal. Assisting a homebirth as a provider – such as a homebirth midwife would do – swings toward illegal in most states. For this reason, practicing homebirth midwifery is a risk.
Why do some midwives choose to take this risk? For many, it is a labor of love, or a labor of ideals. Many midwives and their clients find the legal status of homebirth to be an affront to our civil rights. Taking away our right to birth at home takes away our first right as a parent – to bring a child into this world in what we consider the safest and most protective way possible.
Other midwives might choose to practice at home because they truly are less qualified than a birth center or hospital would require them to be. Just as not all doctors are created equal, neither are all midwives.
Midwives that practice at the hospital or a birth center will have the required state certifications for their practice. However, these midwives are likely to only take low risk patients. All high risk patients will be referred to an obstetrician. Remember that the hospital’s definition of high risk could be quite broad compared to your own.
You probably already have a feel for where you are comfortable. If you swing heavily toward the hospital or toward home, always try to find a provider that practices in your comfort zone. Outside of extraordinary circumstances, the number one rule for giving birth is you must be comfortable. You must feel safe and unthreatened.
If you can see yourself comfortable in both environments, consider researching different perspectives on both hospital births and homebirths. A good starting point is the documentary, “The Business of Being Born.”> Some of the most influential books on my decision to birth at home were Baby Catcher: Chronicles of a Modern Midwife, by Peggy Vincent, and all of Ina May Gaskin’s books, especially Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth.
Prenatal program
Any midwife you choose must emphasize prenatal nutrition. The sad reality in the US is that most of us are not getting the nutrients we need from our food. To begin with, our farmland has been tapped of its true nutrients due to unsustainable and chemical farming practices, so the food that does grow there is not nearly as nutritious as it should be. Then, as a country, we eat far too much processed foods high in sugar and salt. The processed food is like an anti-nutrient. It depletes our body of what nutrients we do have stored and puts us in a state of starvation while being overfed. This is not the way to grow a baby.
All birth providers, midwives included, should emphasize a whole-foods diet completely free of processed food. They should emphasize a proper protein intake such as that found at Blue Ribbon Baby.. They should guide you to a quality food-based multivitamin, never synthetic vitamins.
Because expectant moms have problems with nausea and food aversions, it is incredibly important that your birth provider help guide you and hold you accountable for your nutrition. This can’t be overstated. Like the rest of the natural world, human beings don’t hold onto their pregnancies and remain fertile if they are malnourished.
Discussion Points
When you find a midwife who you feel might be a good fit for you, here are a few questions you might include in your initial conversation.
• How many of your births end up in a cesarean section?
• What would happen if my pregnancy turned high-risk at some point?
• What would happen in the case of a transfer? Where would we transfer to? Would you stay with me?
• How do you feel about VBACs?
• Do you do water births?
• I like a midwife who is very hands-off at my birth (or very hands-on). How do you feel about that?
Finally, always consider the references of others. If you are involved in a group of moms who have used midwives, pay close attention to their stories. If you aren’t in a group, consider looking for one. And never, ever make your decision based on cost alone. It will be well worth your money to find the right fit, not the right price.
Other Posts by Julie Stockman:
When Mama Really Does Know Best: Why I Love Tandem Nursing
Organic Food Shopping Tips
Ideas for Finding a Good Naturopath or Nutritionist in Your Area
Julie Stockman lives in Farmland, Indiana where she homeschools her children with her husband, Jeff. She spends her days baking, gardening, keeping chickens, exploring the nature around them, practicing gratitude and mindfulness, and writing about it all on her blog, Heirloom Homestead.